Welcoming Change

Change is part of life. It is not always welcome and sometimes it’s wanted. At other times it is the opposite. Change means letting go of what I know. The routine, what is known and familar. I have clung to the things that have hindered my growth in Jesus because if fearing change. Other times I have tried to force change into my life with varying results.

Welcoming change is different from wanting change. For myself, welcoming it means submitting to what God has planned for my life. Some of the best things in my life have come from the unexpected and unplanned changes. Forcing me to move forward or even away from situations that were not healthy or had hindered my growth. I had no choice but to adjust and move forward. In welcoming change, I allow for growth in my trust of Jesus and what He has in store for my life.

Wanting change, in my experience has been an exercise of running away. Believing that in having this change that something else in my life would be cured. Each time I have been wrong.  Often making things in my life more frustrating. I was not willing to see that in forcing change in my life, I was only exasperating other things. Sins I was unwilling to confess. That I falsely believed could be remieded by changing jobs or moving, what I was trying to leave behind ended up staying right with me.

Change is inevitable, often coming into my life swiftly and unexpectedly. As in anything else in life, how I react to it is what defines me. It reveals where I do place my trust and it is not always in Christ. Instead I look to people in my life for validation or inclusion for my hope. By leaning into the lessons of change in my life I have grown in my trust of Christ. Perhaps that the best reason of all to welcome change in my life. To understand that though much will change in my life, God will always be constant and unchanging. That is a great comfort for me.

 

 

Writing Utensils - Pen and Keyboard

To Write or Not To Write…

When I began blogging consistently over four years ago I wanted a place to tell my weightloss story. Then it evolved into a more organic form of blogging, scheduled but organic. I say organic because I did not have a real strategy for what I was doing. Some months it was focused on faith, other times the writing process and then back to weightloss. I truly do not know if being so all over the map hindered the way my blog grew.

In the last few months, as I moved this blog back to WordPress and not posting as often. I have taken time to think about what I want to do.

I was excited to begin my career as a freelance writer, but excitment can only get one so far when fear is involved. Looking back I have allowed fear to creep in and lie to me. I got a few jobs for writing but I did not follow through as I should have with them. Working them to lead me to another job and another because I feared not having a consistent paycheck to depend on. In fact I still do.

So much of the fear has to do with a lack of education on my part. I’ve been lazy and distracted by the busyness of my life. It doesn’t help matters that I am unsure of how to categorize myself as a writer, what box or boxes do I check off? Do I want to check off those boxes? I am not sure that my skills as a writer are best suited for on spec work.

I have not worked in my novel as I should of been and how I want to. I have stories to tell and tell them I will. One thing I do know is that I want to write and I will always write. No matter the form it takes. Will it be blogging, publishing a book or scribbling in a notebook? Perhaps all three, perhaps one or two of them. In some way, writing will always be in my life. A writer I will always be, a writer I have always been.